What was lost....

I can ‘t tell you how old I was, when I was first taught how to ride a bike with no training wheels , but I can tell how it happened and what color my bike was. With most of the things I did as a child I have to guess my age, but I have no problem picturing the events in my head. In some cases I can see them too well. When I was young my mom, dad ,and I lived on the same street as my cousins, and at least 3 aunts and uncles, as well as my Grandma Delores and my Grandpa John. We lived on Lyon street.

It was my whole world. I didn’t need to be anywhere else. I had my cousins to play with and to spend the night. My best friend Amanda lived down the street. It was all I needed. My family was around me.

I always loved Christmas eve. We would all go to my Grandmas house and celebrated it there ( we celebrated everything there). Me and my mom would always be the first ones who showed up, because my mom would help my Grandparents cook, and it was always exciting for me to watch who was coming through front door next .

It’s a wonderful thing to have family. When you have so many to get gifts for. And even to get gifts from the ones that love you.

Us kids had our spots we picked every year it was so much fun.

Every Sunday we would go to church also . My mom didn’t go but I did, and I would set with my grandma and my cousins. Then after church we would all go to my grandparents house and have Sunday dinner.

But little by little my world came tumbling down as well as my families….

When I was young I was hurt by a cousin, and I didn’t have the courage to say or do anything.

Also my grandma had gotten sick .

She had a heart attack. She was in the hospital for a week . Then as she was getting better they were going to transfer her to a different hospital, but on the way she had a stroke. So they had to bring her back.

She was paralyzed on the left side of her body. And it had changed her.

I saw my Grandmother as a strong woman before, and after her stroke , she was more like a child. Even the way she acted.
It wasn’t that I loved my grandma any less . It just hurt because I know my grandma liked running things and taking care of people not people taking care of her. It was hard.

We stopped having Sunday dinner, and I didn’t go to church with her anymore. (I feel so bad about that. Maybe that’s why I can’t go now? )

Everyday after school instead of walking home I would walk to my grandmas, because my mom would take care of her until my grandpa got home, and my grandma could never be home alone.

One day it was almost Valentines day. Grandma was in a good mood that day. Smiling at everyone. Which was rare usually my grandma had cried a lot .My mom left grandma’s early ,but I was there . Watching television. Grandma came in and told me I could leave. I didn’t want to , but she insisted she would be ok, so I left.

A little while later, I guess my uncle went to visit her he had found her. He ran to our house, and the next thing I knew I was hearing my mom crying on the phone screaming she’s dead , she’s dead!

Then I found out it was my grandma they were talking about She had fallen from a stool . So I ran down to her house. Their was an ambulance there and my little cousin was standing outside crying. Seeing as I couldn’t go in. I ran to my aunt Dixie’s who lived down the street.

I told her what happened. She was babysitting and she asked me to watch the kids she had so she could run to my grandmas.

It was something I will never forget. I felt so bad for leaving. I should have never of left her alone.

That night I was cent to some friends house. After it was all over I found out I lost my grandma.

I blamed myself for not staying for the simple fact I knew better.

After that the family I knew fell a part. I was an only child but my cousins were close and I had lost that. We all did . The Christmas Eves were gone. We had tried to have one the year after my grandma had passed away, but it wasn’t the same . So we didn’t try again. My aunts and uncles all moved away. All of our get togethers are no more, and I hardly ever see my cousins. Never take your family get togethers for granted. I hear people say all the time how they hate them, but when they are gone you will miss them, and how they were. Believe me I know. You will miss the love it brought so much it hurts...